Random weekendness

I am not feeling well this week. At all. Looks like it’s a good weekend to binge-watch tv. Maybe we will get through season 3 of The Sopranos. Yes, I know I’m a little late to the party.

How do you clean a cloth lampshade? Remind me to Google that.

Yesterday I counted three picture frames in my house that have no photograph in them. I’ve gotten used the the woman and baby that are in them.

I spent a portion of last night painting my nails the exact color of my skin. Not on purpose. My skin is “pale cashmere” in case anyone was interested.

So, I had never heard of the superhero Gin Genie. She generates seismic waves equal to her blood alcohol content. This is my new goal in life. Of course, I will have to start drinking more than I do now (which is zip since VSG surgery) and I will have to up my tolerance level (which is 1 1/2 drinks, maybe less now).

OMG. I Googled how to clean a cloth lampshade and there are 42 steps. Y’all, I’m crafty and lazy. This is why God invented tape. I rolled out some tape and 5 minutes later my lamp shades look brand new. I’m the Martha Stewart for lazy people. Martha Stewart THE Martha Stewart, not Martha Stewart, my dermatologist.

Why is the recorder an instrument only used in 4th grade? The Decemberists or The Lumineers need to have a recorder up on their next album. Let’s bring recorders back.

Here’s a picture  of Johnny Cash eating a cake for you weekend.

Johnny-Cash-eating-cake

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